


You ain't never had a friend like me

by kiri_zan



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Supernatural Elements
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-24
Updated: 2016-05-27
Packaged: 2018-06-04 07:24:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6647983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiri_zan/pseuds/kiri_zan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Zoro enters a store to buy a simple gift, he doesn't know that his life was about to be changed forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was a nice warm summer evening. Most of the shop owners of the Grand Line city had already closed their stores and were enjoying the rest of the day with their families or friends. Despite the late hour, a young man was running desperately through the streets, trying to find an opened shop.

The man, Zoro, once again had forgotten about his job, training and kendo lessons, to buy for his friend a birthday gift.

This time Nami would never forgive him if he came at her party empty-handed.

Reaching for the third time the end of the same street, Zoro sighed. He had looked for every corner but nothing, all the shops were closed. He could already hear the screams of Nami and the mocking laughter of his friends.

Maybe he could just ditch the party? No, it would have been much worse.

Dragging himself to the party, Zoro tried to invent a solid excuse when something captured his attention. A basement store, almost invisible by distracted bystanders, was still opened. Zoro smiled excited and ran down the stairs. It was actually an antique store, a very small one, and illuminated only by old chandeliers hanging from the creamy walls.

“Do you need a hand, son?”

A little old man was suddenly at his side catching Zoro off guard. He had white hair, little blue eyes and barely reached Zoro's middle.

Zoro nodded his head, looking the old man wary. The place was full of furniture and he didn’t know where to start to look for something that Nami could like.

“I need to buy a gift, old man.”

“For who?”

“It's for a girl.”

The man hummed and started to search through the old crap.

“What about a ring?”

“A ring?”

The man looked at Zoro with a malicious smile.

“It's not for your girlfriend?”

“What? No!” exclaimed Zoro frustrated by the allusion. The owner chuckled taking an old box from under an elegant black table.

“Pardon me, young man. So, what about a bracelet?” asked he then, opening the box.

Zoro looked at the old bracelets bored. He wasn’t an expert in jewelers. The only thing that he had ever worn were his three gold earrings. Seriously, what was the difference between blue or azure stones? For him, they were all the same.

The old man chuckled again seeing the confusion in Zoro's eyes.

“What's your friend favorite color?”

Zoro scratched his head.

“I guess orange?”

The owner nodded and started searching through the box murmuring to himself. “Here it is!” he said holding a gold bracelet with little orange stones. It was really nice and perfect for Nami.

“What's the price?”

“For you only 7500 berry.”

It wasn't cheap but not even out of his budget, besides he didn’t have any more time to look for something else.

“Ok, I take this.”

“Would you like something else?” the old mand asked then with pleading eyes. “If you buy another thing, I will give you this bracelet at the half of his price.”

Zoro wanted to say no but -and he didn’t even know why- he wasn't capable to refuse the old owner. Looking around the shop, he tried to find something cheap.

“This here,” Zoro said, taking randomly an object on sale.

The man blinked his eye shocked. “The old lamp? Are you sure?”

Oh, so it was a lamp? Zoro had never seen one like this. Actually, it looked more like a teapot. Maybe he could give it to Robin for her next birthday. She was always interested in this old crap.

“If it's not ok for you, old man, I can leave it here and buy only the bracelet.”

“Oh no! It's actually perfect!” the owner said with a strange glint in his eyes. 

Really, what was wrong with him?

The man wrapped the bracelet in a beautiful box and put the lamp in a normal shopping bag.

“You know, this lamp is here since I opened this store. Nobody was ever interested in it,” the man told him, giving him the bag.

“All the stuff looks like it’s here since ever,” Zoro said rudely but the owner only laughed.

“Maybe, it was waiting for you.”

Zoro arched an eyebrow unimpressed.

“It’s only a lamp, old man.”

That he didn’t even know how it worked.

“Have a nice night!” The owner had a big grin on his face, probably happy for being able to sell something today.

Zoro murmured a goodbye and got out of the old shop. He could already taste the flavor of the beer on his tongue.

 

 

* * *

 

 

When Zoro came back at home that night he was very hungry.

There hadn’t been any accidents at the party, for once, and Nami was very happy with his gift. Too bad that he showed up a little too late, one of his friends had already eaten all of his food and Nami had kept nothing more for him.

Zoro entered tired in his little kitchen and tried to switch the light but the room stayed in the dark.

“Right.”

Zoro had forgotten that the light bulb had broken the previous day. He was going to search for a torch but then he remembered his last acquisition. Zoro went back in the leaving room and took the lamp that he had bought.

He remembered the old man’s words and laughed. This was a simple fortune.

“How does it even work,” Zoro mumbled to himself, examining the bronze lamp. It looked very old and dusty.

Sitting on his red patched up couch, Zoro started to clean off the filth -that the lazy owner had not removed- with his bare hands. Strangely, the lamp started to warm up.

“Should it work so?” the young man questioned confused, still cleaning off the dust, but then the lamp became too hot and he threw it on the floor.

“What the hell?!” Zoro yelled, blowing on his burned hands. “What did the old bastard give to me?”

In response, the lamp started to emit thick black smoke.

Zoro stood up from the couch and tried to get out of the room but he couldn’t see anything with the fog. Zoro closed his eyes as they started to sting and placed a hand over his mouth trying to not alienate the smoke.

He will kill that old man when he was out of this mess. Of course, nobody would buy a thing that tries to kill you! He will bring that damn lamp back to his owner and then he will kill him. But first he must find his phone and call Luffy's brother Ace, maybe he could give him some advice being a fireman.

“You can now open your eyes, shithead.”

Zoro blinked his eyes surprised. His living room looked normal, the few things that he had looked intact and the smoke had almost disappeared, but nobody was there.

Had he imagined the voice?

“Up here, you idiot.”

Zoro looked towards the direction of the deep voice and he fell back on the couch with wide eyes.

There was a lanky man in his living room wearing a black suit and a blue shirt. He had styled blond hair that covered his right eye, a dark goatee, and a strange curly eyebrow.

Not only there was a stranger in his home but said dude was sitting relaxed not on a simple stool but in the air.

“Wh-who are you?”

The floating man grinned and took a cigarette from his package -appeared out of nowhere- swaying his long legs one over the other.

“Now, isn’t it obvious,” the man said, lighting up and inhaling dramatically the cigarette. “I’m a genie and I’m here to grant all of your wishes, _master_.”

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update but there was always something that I didn't like in this chapter but here it is!  
> Thanks for the feedback :)

Zoro didn’t like this supposed genie, not even a bit. How could you take someone seriously when they call you with a smug face master? The guy was obviously playing with him but Zoro wasn’t the type to sit around. They could play this game in two.

“Shouldn’t you be blue?”

“What?” Now was the turn of genie to be confused. Taking advantage of his distraction, Zoro took one of his swords hidden under the couch -for emergencies- and pointed it at the intruder.

“I mean it, who are you? And what do you want?”

The genius sighed and inhaled his cigarette deeply. He was very theatrical in his every movement. It was like watching an actor playing on a show.

“Put down the sword or you will regret it.”

Zoro grinned at the words, he had already forgotten his previous hunger. It had been a long time since he was so excited by a challenge. And sure, it’s not every day that you have someone flying in your living room but Zoro wasn’t someone who was easily intimidated.

“You want to bet?”

Zoro attacked and the genie rolled his visible eye still keeping his cigarette in his mouth. Zoro didn’t know how, it had happened all too fast, but he found himself on the ground with the foot of the guy on his back trapping him on the floor.

"Why must it always be so complicated? Couldn’t I get for once a beautiful lady?” the genie complained, annoyed.

Zoro growled and tried to get free but it felt like he had tons of weight on his back. When he had attacked the guy it had been like he had passed through a ghost, how had it been possible? Who was this guy?

“Get off me!” Zoro exclaimed, trying to get his sword a few feet from him.

“As you wish, Moss-head.” The genie gave him a little bump before getting off him and floating again in the air.

Zoro stood up aching, taking back the sword, and looked at him with awe. “At what kind of game are you playing?”

“Didn’t I already told you, _Master_?” the genie asked rhetorically with the smug face that Zoro started to hate with all his guts.

“Are you like a ghost?” he asked suspiciously, looking the genie up and down.

“Not a ghost, I’m not dead, idiot.”

Now, Zoro wasn’t an expert of genies, (he didn’t even know they came out of old lamps) but there was one thing that he remembered thanks to one of those movie nights with his friends, although he always fell asleep most of the times.

“Genies are blue, so you aren’t one.”

The genie raised an eyebrow offended.

“What the hell are you talking about ?! Of course, I’m one!”

“Genies have tails and not strange curly eyebrow. And they are not dressed like one of these stupid models of a fashion cover.”

“Now, listen to me,” the guy started, approaching his face with a mad expression. It looked like he was close to losing his patience. “I don’t know who told you this false story of the blue genies but you should know that only we come out from lamps! And thanks to my magic I can wear what I want, clear?!”

Zoro was not convinced. “Ok, then what do you want?”

The genie's face became more mad and his hair raise up, like the fur of an angry dog.  Somehow the tide had turned with now the genie being the angry one.

“I already told you, dumbass! I am here to fulfill your true wishes!”

“Well, I'm not interested. I’ll bring you back to the old owner tomorrow.”

The genie lost his temper and fired up, literally. His legs were surrounded by dangerous hot red-yellow flames making increase drastically the temperature in the room. The guy looked more like a devil than a genie now. “You can’t, you bastard! _Did_ _you rub my lamp? Did you wake me up? Did you bring me here?_ Now you will deal with it!"

“All right, you crazy guy,” Zoro agreed, only because he didn’t want his house burned to ashes.

It would have been difficult to explain what happened to the owner of the house.

So, the guy wanted to fulfill his wishes? Here was it one. "I want you to disappear."

“Ah ah," the genie laughed without humor, throwing the consumed cigarette away. "Unfortunately I can’t go away from here, although I would wish it too in your place."

"Ok, Curly-eyebrow. Then what should I do to send you back here?" Zoro asked, sitting back on the couch and still holding his sword. He could not hit him but he would not let his guard down.

“My name is Sanji,” the genie said irritated, lighting a new cigarette. “And you can’t send me simple back there, but if you ask me just something I’ll go in the lamp for now.”

“So you are one of those guys who likes to please.” 

“I’m a genie, you idiot. It’s my job!”

“And what must I do to send you away?”

“When the true wish of your heart will be realized and you'll be happy with it, I won’t be able anymore to grant you wishes and the lamp will disappear forever from your life,” the genie explained, starring at the end out the window with a distant gaze.

“So, I can ask you whatever I want.”

“Not everything,” the genie corrected him, looking back at Zoro. “I can’t, one: kill or hurt someone, two: bring people back from the dead and three:” the genie paused, looking Zoro with a more threatening gaze. “-make someone fall in love with a moss head like you or with anyone else.”

“Like if I was interested,” Zoro commented, studying the lamp on the floor. Suddenly he remembered why he had rubbed the lamp in the first place. It was time to test really the genie’s power.

“The light bulb in my kitchen is broken, make it light again.”

“As you wish, Master.”

“And stop to call me master, it’s weird.”

“Moss-head?”

“And not even that!”

“Maybe Roronoa Zoro?”

Zoro looked surprised and the genie grinned snapping his fingers. Zoro turned his head, he could see from his position the kitchen light work again. And --wow- maybe all this wish story wasn’t so bad and deal with the dude was worth it.

“How do you know my name?”

The genie pointed a finger at a shelf in the wall.

“It’s written in your trophy, Number two.”

Zoro looked at the wall and regretted his previous thought of the obnoxious genie. He wasn’t fond of that silver cup, it reminded him of his failure but he had decided to leave it on the shelf as a reminder that he must work more to reach the top.

“Where are you going now?” the genie questioned him when he saw Zoro get up from the couch.

“I’m going to sleep,” Zoro said, yawning and stretching his arms. He was tired of the conversation and he had enough of assholes genies for today. He needed to sleep right now.

“You can stay here, just don’t disturb me.”

“What about the true wish?” the genie asked curious, holding up an arm. “Don’t you have one?”

“I have one,” Zoro said, stopping at the door and looking the other with an arrogant face. “But I don’t need you or your powers, only I can make my dream true.”

The genie put his hands in his pockets. “And what is it?” 

“Maybe I’ll tell you another time,” Zoro answered, laughing satisfied at the dumb face of the genie.

Zoro stopped in the kitchen before going to bed bringing his sword with him out of habit. He went to turn the light off but nothing happened. This time the bulb didn’t want to switch off.

Damn the curly asshole! He knew that he couldn’t trust him.

Zoro returned angrily in the living room looking for the genie but there was no trace of him. He probably was back in his lamp to plot who knows what. The young man cursed him again and went to his bedroom.  He threw himself tired in his bed, stroking the long scar under his shirt, and fell asleep.

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

The morning was already coming.

Sanji could see the sun rise up from the window marking the beginning of a new day. It was beautiful to see again the dark night fade away in shades of orange and yellow. It had been a long time since he had seen the last dawn. Sanji sighed and glared at the lamp who kept him trapped in this condition. He could get out of there at the moment that someone awakened the lamp but he couldn’t go far away from it. Sometimes he wishes that he could destroy the damn lamp but it was impossible, the rules were clear and he had learned it at the hard way.

Sanji lit the first cigarette of the morning and inhaled.

It was always the same story. Someone found the old lamp, asked their wishes till they were happy with their lives and didn’t need him anymore. Sanji’s goal usually was to make it happen quickly, the sooner the better, but sometimes he liked to fool his masters a little at first. However, this time it looked more difficult to satisfy his new master, or rather moss-headhow Sanji liked to call him.

The man was very cryptic, transparent and idiotic at the same time. Normally people would ask for money or power, but the asshole had barely asked him something, and this was very humiliating for a genie. Plus, the moss-head hadn't even been impressed by his presence, when usually common people had freaked out. It was like he, the genie, was the nuisance and not the other way. He didn’t like it, he will not permit Roronoa Zoro to make fun of him or to underestimate him.

Sanji looked around the place with bored eyes, the home was actually pretty big but it had only the necessary things. There were four rooms: kitchen, bathroom, living room and a bedroom that he didn’t see with the moss-head being asleep there. The kitchen was really small and a bit disordered. A lot of glass and plates were left on the counter but he had seen bigger and chaotic kitchens. The living room was quite simple, it had white walls and furniture that reminded the oriental style, except for the patchy red couch. Actually, the more fancy thing that you could find there was the ugly silver cap on the wood shelf. It said: “Grand line swordsman tournament, second place, Roronoa Zoro”. It wasn’t so difficult to guess the moss-head dream now, but it still annoyed Sanji that the swordsman didn’t want to tell him.

Speak of the devil, Sanji heard rumors coming from the other room, the moss-head had finally gotten up.

Only after a few minutes Zoro appeared on the door dressed in a crumpled white t-shirt matched by black jeans. His hair was a mess and his face looked like it needed more hours of sleep.

How many hours had passed? Four? Sanji wasn’t sure. Not that time meant something for a genie.

“Oh, you are still here. . .” Zoro greeted him, yawning without putting a hand in front of his mouth.

“Where should I be?!” Sanji shouted annoyed, rolling his eyes.

“I don’t know, in your teapot?”

“It’s a lamp.”

“Oh, right,” Zoro said clearly uninterested, heading to another room.

Sanji followed him bored but then smiled devilishly when he saw Zoro deal with the kitchen’s lights.

Someone a long time ago had told him that, yeah, genies can’t kill you but sure they can make your life hell if you weren’t on their good list. And after the previous night Zoro surely wasn’t in Sanji’s one.

Zoro climbed stubborn on the table, since the light didn't switch off, and tried to remove the bulb with a cloth to protect his hands.

Sanji gazed at Zoro’s stunt skeptically. Even he, who was born hundreds of years ago, knew that this wasn’t a good idea. The shit-head needed more hours of sleep if he came with this foolish ideas.

“Ouch!” Here it is, the moron had lost the grip of the cloth and had burned his fingers. He was lucky that he didn’t get shocked.

“Can’t you fix the damn light?” Zoro demanded finally, coming down from the table with a heavy jump.

“You had only to ask,” Sanji scoffed him and with a snap of his fingers he turned the light off.

Zoro scowled annoyed blowing on his burned fingers like the last night.

“Because of you, my next electricity bill will be huge!”

“You should pay attention to what you ask,” Sanji stated nonchalantly.

“There won’t be the next time,” Zoro growled, opening the fridge.

Sanji noticed sadly that the fridge was pretty empty. Did the idiot even have a proper diet? And how many meals did he have in a day? _Wait_ , Sanji told to himself, this wasn’t his business.

After a quick search, Zoro took the remained milk carton and drank directly from the container like a barbarian, and ate strange looking biscuits from a jar on the kitchen counter. Zoro looked back at Sanji with a funny face that resembled a hamster and offered him the food.

Sanji blinked his eyes surprised and shook his head. A genie didn’t have to deal with things that others humans needed to survive, like sleep, medicine or food. . .

“Thanks but no thanks, I don’t need to eat,” he said, trying to be casual.

Zoro cocked his head thoughtful and then shrugged his shoulder. “Good, more for me.” He drank the rest of the milk and dried his mouth with the back of a hand.

Sanji grimaced, disgusted. Didn’t nobody teach this man manners?

Not being aware of the genie’s inner talk, Zoro looked at the clock on the wall and blinked his eyes. “Oh damn!” he cursed, running out of the room with a confused Sanji at his heels.

“What is it now?” Sanji asked, leaning on the wall and observing the man putting on his shoes in a hurry.

“It’s late,” Zoro said, taking a gym bag. “Today it’s Saturday!”

Really? Wanted to ask Sanji but he waited for the other man to continue and lit a new cigarette.

“And I have the kids training in the morning.”

“So you are late for your job?” Sanji completed, trying to hide a smirk behind his hand who hold the cigarette.

“You know, you have only to ask the right wish.”

Zoro stopped the search of his home keys and looked suspicious at him like he was some kind of devil who was trying to tempt him. Maybe he wasn’t wrong.

“You can take me there in time?”

“Like I said, you have only to ask.”

Zoto frowned in frustration and took the phone from his pocket. He looked at the time then the genie and then back at the phone. Time wasn’t on his side. Sanji grinned when Zoro gave him a short nod.

“No tricks this time!” Zoro pointed out, taking the lamp in his hands back in the living room

“Never had made one,” Sanji replied smoothly. It wasn’t his fault if people couldn’t express clearly their desires.

Zoro sighed and took a deep breath.

“Ok, I wish to be in time at the dojo where I work.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

Zoro had hardly any regrets but this time he wanted to punch himself or better the genie in the face. Why had he asked another wish when he had told to himself to never do it again?

Zoro tightened his eyes and growled at the amused laugh that he could hear even though the wind. He will surely reach the dojo in time, it was right beneath him. Pity that he was falling from the blue sky and, unlike that asshole, he couldn’t fly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should I add Zoro torture and Sanji being-a-little-shit in the tags? Let me know XD

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! This is my first long Zosan fic. Yes, Sanji is a genie but not a classic one, you will see ;)  
> There will some references to others shows (aside Aladdin XD) that I will tell you later because I don't want to spoil anything for now :D also this was inspired by a fantastic fanart that I saw on tumblr.  
> English is not my first language so sorry for eventual errors. Hope you like it, bye!


End file.
